Welcome to my adventures and experiments in creativity. Where writing is like running: sometimes I know where I'm going, and sometimes I see where the mood takes me.


Tuesday 8 January 2013

The Non-Review Of 2012


At the dawn of a new year, the creative world is possessed by an almost cultish fascination with reviewing the 12 months just ended. This is understandable because when you are accountable only to yourself, nobody offers the opportunity to appraise your performance or set goals for the immediate future.

For me, creatively, 2012 started so badly that ending the year still sane was an achievement in itself. There is nothing to review, and there is nothing to say about 2013. I have goals in mind, but things are ‘fluid’ at the moment and – as per my last post – I’m all about doing.

So I thought I’d ‘review’ in a different way. Thought I’d make a (roughly chronological) list of things I experienced or achieved for the first time in the last calendar year. Not all of them are successful; most of them don’t relate to creativity. But they all build a round picture, and act as a reminder that we often do more than we perhaps realise:

- Got back to basics and enjoyed a board games day; played Formula One, Ocean Trader and introduced my friends to the game Risk.
- Worked for a multi-national, foreign-owned company.
- Climbed York Minster.
- Was invited to a celebration event for the writing course I attended in the second half of 2011.
- Made up a poor excuse for not going and missed the celebration event due to low confidence.
- Received training on manual handling, COSHH, and environmental awareness (sadly, the latter not from Captain Planet).
- Went to see the Strictly Come Dancing live tour.
- Ate Chinese food served in half a pineapple.
- Hosted a barbecue in January.
- Suffered the ordeal of ordering glasses through Specsavers.
- Bought clothes based on the requirements of a television production company.
- Experienced a corporate evening out bowling.
- Had a photo done for the ‘staff’ section of the work website.
- Filmed and appeared on a television game show.
- Spent £30 on raffle tickets in one night and won nothing.
- Single-handedly looked after Chloe for five days.
- Deliberately purchased trainers for running.
- Spent several hundred pounds on a dog kennel … to go in the back of the car.
- Visited Cleethorpes.
- Left Cleethorpes after a Morrison’s salad box, half an hour’s walking, and an ice cream.
- Paid £8.50 to take Chloe into the Italian gardens at the Trentham Estate (not sure she appreciated it).
- Went to a full evening session of bingo and won £20.
- Spent a night in a Travelodge at work’s expense.
- Visited Gateshead.
- Bought an iPhone.
- Rode a Segway.
- Fell off a Segway.
- Had a member of the public record his phone conversation with me.
- Live tweeted during sex.
- Included a joke on this list.
- Ate Junior Mints and saw Jerry Seinfeld perform stand up.
- Celebrated four years in a relationship.
- Watched the first three Die Hard films.
- Started writing ‘Lord of the Rings cricket’, eighteen months after originally coming up with the idea.
- Visited the Cotswolds.
- Won a plant as a prize for winning a quiz.
- Refused to watch myself on television.
- Participated in a Jubilee tea party.
- Won the board game version of Pointless.
- Spent a month with a cough.
- Visited Ireland/Dublin, saw an 800-year-old book, and witnessed Bloomsday.
- Flew with Ryanair.
- Drove a courtesy car.
- Bought a box of 100 packets of football stickers.
- Had breakfast at Blakehall Fisheries near Cheadle.
- Visited the BBA (British Board of Agrement) in Watford.
- Nearly suffered whiplash from a taxi driver braking suddenly just to ogle a woman while saying, “Look at those!”
- Visited Swallow Falls in North Wales.
- Started Christmas shopping in August.
- Envied the atmosphere at an Olympic Judo event.
- Celebrated one year of owning a dog.
- Returned home to find a leather sofa chewed up by our dog.
- Learnt how to perform U-value calculations and got a certificate declaring me to be competent.
- Bought a proper rucksack, with chest and abdomen straps and everything.
- Drank an Italian soda.
- Ate a seven-course meal.
- Discovered that Belgian waffles are an excellent dessert.
- Ran six miles in one go (and in about an hour).
- Expressed interest in running a half marathon.
- Visited Tebay services on the M6.
- Spent a week in the Scottish Highlands and saw Loch Ness.
- Climbed, and stood at the summit of, Ben Nevis.
- Had an existential crisis on the side of a mountain.
- Listened to a German man sing the Italian national anthem in German; worked with a Spaniard.
- Wrote a haiku.
- Dreamt that I let a man plummet to his death in a broken lift.
- Dreamt that a woman tried to kill me with a felt tip pen.
- Sampled the ‘hottest curry in the world’ (Satan’s Ashes).
- Attended a race night (and took part ‘ownership’ of a horse called ‘Fear of Loss’).
- Purchased dedicated running gear and a book called ‘How To Run Faster’.
- Suffered a bleeding nipple and bought Vaseline to combat it.
- Bought a rolling pin.
- Had a tweet retweeted by two people!
- Cooked a full roast dinner, toad in the hole, rump steak, and a savoury pie (though not all on the same day).
- Visited Cardiff and the Doctor Who Experience.
- Squealed like a girl when Felix Baumgartner jumped ‘from the edge of space’.
- Conceived the idea for a digital magazine called ‘On The Eighth Day’.
- Attended a dog agility class (with a dog).
- Compiled a photobook.
- Used all seven of my tiles in one go during a game of Scrabble.
- Visited Denmark/Copenhagen, and a Danish Lego store; spent £16 on a starter, and visited a continental indie cinema.
- Got asked to take a photo by two different people on the same day.
- Had serious inspiration for a proper actual book that even I might be able to write and finish.
- Wore the Studio Ghibli t-shirt I bought in Japan four years ago, because it finally fitted comfortably.
- Got ‘star letter’ in ‘Dogs Today’ magazine.
- Wrote 5000 words in less than a week, and completed a draft of a 12,000 word document (a guide to creative lessons we can learn from football).
- Bought a book to learn HTML coding.

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